Giving Thanks

    One thing that has always been constant in my life is prayer.  Even though I didn't grow up going to church a lot, praying was something that I picked up as a child and stuck with.  My prayers always started out the same.  "Now I lay me down to sleep..." and so on and so on.  After the traditional preface,  I went straight to the asking of blessings for my family, friends, and pets.  I prayed that God would bless them and keep them safe.  After that, it was time for the thank you's.  Thank you for my parents, thank you for my sister and brother, and the list went on.  Some days it included such things as books, Reese's cups, and school hat day.  I always had plenty to be thankful about it, and I wanted to make sure that the big man upstairs new about it.

    Now, at the age of 25, I still find myself praying.  I'll be the first to admit that to whom I'm praying to has become a lot more hazy over the years.  Doubt and life experiences have made it hard to feel like someone out there cares enough to listen to my prayers. But still, I continue to pray.  

    Now, this post isn't about prayer.  Not exactly.  This post is about thankfulness, which for me is tied into prayer.  The older I've gotten, the more I've realized that sometimes it's hard to remember how blessed I truly am.  Like I'm sure many of you do, I get so bogged down with the bad that I forget to see and appreciate the good.  I let the bad things that happen to me or loved ones outweigh the good things and that just isn't right.

   Of course I always tell whoever it is that might be listening to my prayers how thankful I am for my family, and true friends, and opportunities, but lately I feel that I'm coming up short on thankfulness.  I know that I have so much more to be thankful and grateful for then just these few wonderful things.

     It's no coincidence that this desire to give more thanks happens to coincide with Thanksgiving, my favorite holiday.  For weeks I have been feeling the Autumn blues over being away from my loved ones (and my mom's delicious sweet potato casserole) for the second holiday season in a row.  It hasn't helped that Jesse has been having a lot of difficulties at site and that I have to move to a new apartment because my landlady has decided she wants her apartment back.  These are exactly the type of bad things that I would usually end up focusing on, but I'm putting my foot down this time.  

   My good friend Josie keeps a gratitude journal.  At the end of every day, she writes down the things she is grateful for.  One Christmas, she gave me my own gratitude journal.  I made a couple of entries here and there, but ultimately it ended up sitting on my shelf along with my other treasured journals and books.  Of course now that I am ready to pick it up again, the distance keeps me from doing so.  I'm not going to let that stop me from starting this wonderful habit again, though.  I've decided to begin again.  Right here.  Right now.

Things I'm thankful for this holiday season:

1. My health and the good health of my family and friends.

2.  A family that will always support me no matter which path I end up following.

3. A boyfriend who loves me for me.

4.  The opportunity to live and work in a country so unlike the one I'm from.  Which leads me to my next one...

5.  The fact that I come from a country where any dream is attainable with a little hard work and faith.

6.  Good friends, new and old, who take the time to reciprocate the friendship that I share with them.

7. Radiators, even if mine doesn't work as well as I wish it did.

8.  The internet, because without it, the holiday season would be even more rough.

9.  All of the choices that I have ahead of me.  Although I get stressed thinking about all of the choices I will have to make in six months, I'm thankful that I have them to make.

10.  Lastly, I'm thankful to be exactly where I am right now, in this moment. 

Wishing you all a very Happy Thanksgiving that is full of love and thankfulness.